Most of us can’t imagine working a job with no promise of time off.
Super Heroes Don’t Suffer From Caregiver Guilt
Caregiver guilt is a sly creature who preys on our insecurities. It often strikes when we feel overwhelmed.
When we feel overwhelmed it’s not uncommon to get angry at the situation. We feel guilty because we’re angry, then realize we’re angry because we are tired and overwhelmed.
Round and round we go in a vicious circle….It’s Not Really Funny!!
If only we were superheroes with the power to excel in every facet of caregiving.
I’ll let you in on a little secret…
Sometimes family members actually want you on a guilt trip!!!
I know it’s shocking to hear but now that you know about it, you can avoid this pitfall. Let me share with you how I avoided this deadly trap.
As you know from my previous post, my mom is moving. Mom had been on a waiting list and was called for her new apartment. We thought all the details had been taken care of but there was yet another screening process.
My mother began to fret about something happening and she wouldn’t get the apartment. So we began another round about living with my family. She gave me a list of people and places who had no room for her. She said since I wouldn’t let her in, maybe she could live in a hotel until her money ran out.
I kept driving and asked her: “Is there any reason that you know of that would keep you from getting this apartment?” She said,”No”, so I told her not to worry about it.
I refused to promise her a place with my family if things didn’t work out. I sidestepped that caregiver guilt trap.
By the way….
Things did work out!
When you realize that caregiver guilt has sneaked back into your life, use these three sure fire ways to return to your caregiver best:
- Learn about illnesses and finances so you won’t be caught unaware. The more prepared you are, the more confident you will be in your decisions. When you know you did your best, there is no reason for guilt.
- Take regular breaks from caregiving. You can start with as little as one half hour daily to relax and take care of yourself. Running on empty makes you an easy target for guilt and stress.
- Share responsibilities with other family members and friends. If all else fails contact your Department of Aging and find out about community resources that may be available at little or no cost.
I’ve dealt with my share of caregiver guilt and stress. The more rested and prepared I am, the fewer guilt attacks I have. Check out the “Wildred Recomends” section of the blog for links to software to help make caregiving easier.
While we’re on the subject of making caregiving easier…
Don’t miss my next post, “Daily Money Management For Seniors- Can You Spell PONZI?” Discover what the “buzz” is all about and if you should jump on the bandwagon.